Wrong kind of lawyers on the track

According to Wikipedia the phrase "the wrong kind of snow" was coined by the British media in 1991 after severe weather caused disruption to many of British Rail's train services.

Everyone's favourite and always-accurate encyclopaedia continues:"People who did not realise that there are different kinds of snow saw the reference as nonsensical; in the United Kingdom, the phrase became a byword for euphemistic and lame excuses."

This webpage from BBC News offers a collection of similar, railway-related excuses, including:

• "Thameslink is sorry to announce the cancellation of the 8.16 to Bedford. This is due to slippery rain."
• "We apologise for the late running of this service. This was due to excessive heat on the tracks between Bedford and Luton."
• "The train now arriving on platform one is on fire. Passengers are advised not to board this train."
• "The conductor apologised by saying that the overcrowding was caused by too many passengers.
• "We apologise for the delay to customers on platform one. This is due to a delay in the actual service."

I found myself reminded of the "wrong kind of" phrase today when I came across a newspaper photograph showing a person described in the caption beneath as "divorce lawyer". Nothing unusual about that, really. There's a lot of them about.

But then I begin to wonder: why have I never heard or seen someone, anyone, referred to as "marriage lawyer". As in: "Meet Joan, she's a marriage lawyer from Bristol. And a first-class bridge-player too!" Or perhaps: "Local hotel succeeds in bid to host national conference of marriage lawyers." Or even: "Irish marriage lawyer scoops Lotto jackpot". Marriage lawyers: there seems to be very few of them about.

A quick search on Google reveals the wide gulf between the two flavours of lawyers, with the divorce kind of lawyers (about 1,290,000 of them) outnumbering the marriage kind of lawyers (about 5,540) by a ratio of 233:1.

Moreover, almost all the "marriage lawyers" appear to be focused on the marriage-termination rather than marriage-formation end of the market.

This makes no sense.

At some stage and in some circumstances, most of us will encounter lawyers as we journey along life's railway tracks. When it comes to marriage, why not involve lawyers at the beginning rather than have them arrive at the end? In fact, having a really good "marriage lawyer" at the start might well mean never meeting the other, wrong kind of lawyer at all.

Enjoy your journey :-)